relationship advice needed.....

[Formaldehyde]

I need advice.

First off, I am bisexual. Over the summer my girlfriend of almost two years and I had a rough summer. We eventually broke up at the end of the summer. But we are still best friends and we even live together at school. We are happier now then while we were dating. We both have decided that what we want in life is a husband and a family. And as much as we love each other we can’t do that together. We plan to stay best friends for ever and hopefully live close to each other.
But my problem began over the summer. While we were having a rough time with our relationship I did a lot of thinking and that is when I realized I wanted a husband not a girl friend. So I opened my eyes to other people. And I found someone that I would like to date and I am pretty sure he is willing to see where things can go with us. The problem is that he is my ex-girlfriend/best friend’s brother. I talk to him a few nights a week and I asked her if she had a problem with me talking to her brother. She thinks it is weird because none of her past friends have ever talked to her brothers. But she said “as long as you don’t hit on him, I don’t care.” I think she knows something is up because every time I talk to him I end up having a really happy smile on my face. And she knows this smile.
But I don’t want to hurt my best friend, but I also feel like her brother could be the one I have been looking for. People always tell me to follow your heart...but what do you do if your heart is telling you to do two things? I have tried not talking to him for a while hoping maybe my feelings for him will go away but I just miss him more.

Can anyone give me some advice on how I should handle this?

[Chy]

Hiya and welcome!

That is a tough call and quite frankly does not depend on what your best friend thinks. It's between you and her brother. BUT... I know that there are some people who think there are just certain things off limits when break ups occur and that includes siblings. You can't NOT follow your heart, it will really be a sticky situation for sure but the question is how does HE feel about you? If you think it's a relationship about to happen then you have to be honest with your best friend if you want her to remain as such.

I wouldn't sweat it or worry about anything for right now. However if you do hook up with her brother, she's not going to like it out of a) your her ex and will have some jealousy and b) it's her brother and some people are funny that when when sharing their brothers or sisters with other friends in a relationship way.

Bottom line, do follow your heart, see if it's meant to be and remain 100% honest with your BF at all the times. If it's a relationship meant to be, she should be able to see how happy you are and maybe can be the one to take credit for hooking you up, I think maybe finding her was meant to lead you to him? Boy would that be a funny story when all grown up and an adult. LOL

Good luck!

[Formaldehyde]

Thanks for the advice Chy. I think I might tell him how I feel this weekend and see where that takes me.
If nothing happens between us then so be it but it is worth a shot and I can only hope that if something does work out between me and him my best friend will stay by my side.....