Life Lessons & Major Mistakes...

[Done-With-It!]

Just my .2 cents, but if you ever get into a position where you decide you want to just wipe someone you love out of your life, especially without talking to them, you may want to double think on that.

My step dad and Uncle are learning the hard way right now that they've lost a few good years over something that never even happened. They were so extrememly close and they let someone come between them who they never should have and instead of working it out, they stopped talking. It was at an Extremely Horrible Time for both of them, when they needed each other the most, and they bailed on each other.

I was one of the few people who tried to get them to work it out and was staying with my Uncle when it happened but they didn't want to hear it.

Now they've hurt each other over things that were never said, and never happened, and they are too stubborn to try and fix it.

It's very sad, My mom lost one of her brothers and she can't believe they are to stubborn to work it out. They were as close as any two brothers I've ever seen. I'm hoping (and planning, lol) for
a reunion, but think hard before you make a decision like this.
Talking to them first is always a good thing, don't always believe the first thing you hear someone else tell you, give them the chance to explain. Esp. men, because their anger always rises fast.

[annihilate_me]

That is a major life lesson, and sorry to say I've experienced the same thing. Luckily, I was able to work things out though. Thanks for this tid-bit of wisdom. I'm sure it will help someone!

[Done-With-It!]

Originally Posted by annihilate_me

That is a major life lesson, and sorry to say I've experienced the same thing. Luckily, I was able to work things out though. Thanks for this tid-bit of wisdom. I'm sure it will help someone!

Yea, I think we all at one time or another experience it, our pride, anger, hurt gets in the way, it's easier to say when it is someone else. But I've learned from watching my biological Dad's side of the family to be careful about what you do, you can live to regret some things if your not careful.
People don't live forever, even though we think they do. I have more hope for my step dad and his brother than my dad's side of the family though.
I think they'll work it out, I really hope so. They have a lot to work through, but I think they can do it. They're men, lol, they forgive easily.

[Velvet]

This is a major lesson that sadly we don't learn until something has happened to someone that we love and were mad at or when we grow older. I use to let silly things get in the way of relationships when I was younger. Now that I am older...well, not that old...I have learned to forgive and let go of angers and hurts. Life really is too short, just like the saying.

[Done-With-It!]

Originally Posted by Velvet

This is a major lesson that sadly we don't learn until something has happened to someone that we love and were mad at or when we grow older. I use to let silly things get in the way of relationships when I was younger. Now that I am older...well, not that old...I have learned to forgive and let go of angers and hurts. Life really is too short, just like the saying.

Yea, I did that when I was young also, I forgive easy now usually, I was at my favorite Uncles funeral not long ago, and saw a lot of very miserable people he died at 52.
I have really good relationships with almost all of my friends these days, very
'Rarely' does anything come between us, we usually fix it when it does, that used
to be much harder for me to do. Today it's not, everyone does things for their own reasons. I've grown with most of my friends over time though. My family is a bit more complicated though, lol. They are a bit more set in their 'ways'. They all have to be 'right', and they will not budge. lol, but ya got to love them, Whatever is what I say, let them be.
Drugs are the only thing that have caused my best relationship to cease.
I think those ones are gone to that drug world for good.

[icthus77]

Originally Posted by Done-With-It!

Just my .2 cents, but if you ever get into a position where you decide you want to just wipe someone you love out of your life, especially without talking to them, you may want to double think on that.

My step dad and Uncle are learning the hard way right now that they've lost a few good years over something that never even happened. They were so extrememly close and they let someone come between them who they never should have and instead of working it out, they stopped talking. It was at an Extremely Horrible Time for both of them, when they needed each other the most, and they bailed on each other.

I was one of the few people who tried to get them to work it out and was staying with my Uncle when it happened but they didn't want to hear it.

Now they've hurt each other over things that were never said, and never happened, and they are too stubborn to try and fix it.

It's very sad, My mom lost one of her brothers and she can't believe they are to stubborn to work it out. They were as close as any two brothers I've ever seen. I'm hoping (and planning, lol) for
a reunion, but think hard before you make a decision like this.
Talking to them first is always a good thing, don't always believe the first thing you hear someone else tell you, give them the chance to explain. Esp. men, because their anger always rises fast.

well thank u so much dwi and u are so right. i have seen relationships torn over things that have never happened or that were very minor. its easy to shut someone out when u are angry but its wise not too. and like u said take the time to listen to the other person. i know from experience that even when i was mad or angry at someone i still missed them and it hurt to be apart. and im sure in time they will realize that. il be praying for u and ur family. *hugs* and dont give up hope hun. love ya and take care

[Done-With-It!]

Originally Posted by icthus77

well thank u so much dwi and u are so right. i have seen relationships torn over things that have never happened or that were very minor. its easy to shut someone out when u are angry but its wise not too. and like u said take the time to listen to the other person. i know from experience that even when i was mad or angry at someone i still missed them and it hurt to be apart. and im sure in time they will realize that. il be praying for u and ur family. *hugs* and dont give up hope hun. love ya and take care

Yea, unfortunately we can't change the way other people decide to do things, but we can decide how we want to handle things. It is still hard when you miss someone that you don't want to miss though. I have made far too many mistakes but finally learn from them these days..
I won't give up hope though, never have, never will.