Self Harm, Cutting?

[Done-With-It!]

Anyone struggle with cutting? or any kind of self harm?

Why do you think that you are doing it?



Anyone in recovery from self harm?

Any advice/ideas as to what helped you to quit?

[sallys_scars]

i cutt myself...
ive tried to stop alot but its never worked for more then a few weeks. one of my friends finally said to me a couple days ago"bailey for every cut you make anywhere im doing 4 in that same place you did yours. so you know how much it hurts me."
i just need the right support to stop. i know wat im doing is stupid and just not a good thing to do but i still do it anyway.

[Velvet]

My oldest son use to cut. He would cut himself after drinking alot. He was always a loner. Stayed home and had a fear of being around people. He would worry that if he spoke, it would sound dumb. So he didn't socialize at all. I came home one evening and found him sitting on the bathroom floor with blood smeared all over his head, (which he always kept shaven) and his face. He was totally drunk. I started yelling...he ran out of the house. I couldn't find him. Meanwhile the cops picked him up...took him to ER...since he was intoxicated they could not give him anything for pain...they stapled the slashes in his arms. They had him sit in the room while they were calling the local behavior clinic. He booked and walked home. Ten mile walk. When he got home he pulled the staples out with pliers.
Welcome to my world.
Luckily, that was 4 years ago. He did some definate damage to his arms, mostly. The scars are healing, but will always be there. He no longer cuts. I think this is partly due to the lessons he has learned and the suffering he has seen me go through with my oldest daughters' drug addiction. He has a new job now and his boss asked me the other day about the scars. It is something that he will never be able to forget or hide. I am very lucky that he has quit cutting. It is hell to watch. To this day, he doesn't talk about it to me. I never knew why he did it. I'm not sure if he knows. I am getting my youngest in counseling, and hopefully I will get him to realize that he needs counseling also. It has taken me this long to realize that my kids need help from someone other than me.
If you're a mom or dad reading this, don't make the same mistake that I did. Don't wait for your entire family to fall apart before you seek outside help. Even the best of parents can't "fix" their children.

[Velvet]

Oh SallyScars, talk to someone that you trust and get into some counseling. You are scarring yourself for life. You are hurting inside from something. Tell someone at home that you would like to seek counseling. You are probably a very pretty girl. When you get older you won't want those scars. You won't want to explain them. Please talk to someone who can help you.

[Done-With-It!]

Originally Posted by sallys_scars

i cutt myself...
ive tried to stop alot but its never worked for more then a few weeks. one of my friends finally said to me a couple days ago"bailey for every cut you make anywhere im doing 4 in that same place you did yours. so you know how much it hurts me."
i just need the right support to stop. i know wat im doing is stupid and just not a good thing to do but i still do it anyway.

Sweetie, do you have a plan to stop? What are some things you can do to replace your cutting. Cutting is usually about feelings. Feelings that we can't express or don't know how.

Can you make a verbal contract with your friend that you will call her or someone you trust 'before' you cut. If you can do that, or find something to get past that intense moment right before, it makes it a lot easier to not cut.

Have you been able to throw your 'cutting' stuff away? If it's still around, it makes it a lot harder to stop.

What are some things you can do instead of cutting?

[emo_mia_emo]

i havent cut since the 27th march 2006 but i will probably be back to it again in the near future! xxx carly xxx

[Done-With-It!]

Originally Posted by emo_mia_emo

i havent cut since the 27th march 2006 but i will probably be back to it again in the near future! xxx carly xxx

Carly,

What makes you think you'll be going back to it?

What would help you to not go back there?

[Clippedwings]

I used to cut but stopped about 18 months ago with the help of my wonderful boyfriend.
After finding out he used to cut (although not to the extent I did) I excepted his help and support.

However I have replaced one type of destructive behavour with another, and things are far from ok.
People can stop cutting but the reasons they cut are most likely still going to be there.

If I was in the position to get councilling I would, but I just dont trust the health system over here.

Everyone take care and if you need to talk about anything SI related just PM me

x

[Done-With-It!]

However I have replaced one type of destructive behavour with another, and things are far from ok.
People can stop cutting but the reasons they cut are most likely still going to be there.

If I was in the position to get councilling I would, but I just dont trust the health system over here.

What's up? Do you want to talk about what you replaced it with?

Congrats on the 18 months. I agree that even if you stop the reasons will still be there and they will just manifest themselves into something else.

There's got to be something over there that can help you, no??
You don't think there is any place trustworthy over there???

[Clippedwings]

Its not the whole health system, just my doctors, but I'm working on that.

Plus its the whole steriotype of cutters, most doctors around these parts dont take it seriously and tend to dismiss it if you are under 21.

I'm trying to sort my life out a bit before I sort myself out if that makes sense? I guess I dont want to go into my reasons right now, although one day I will, and then I'll let you know

[RubyTuesday]

My last cut was on the 22nd of March this year after having started cutting when I was 11 and now I'm 16.
One day I just woke up and thought to myself "What am I doing?"
"I'm scarring myself for the rest of my life and I don't want to have to hide myself away anymore."
I didn't tell anyone because it made it harder for me to stop.
I have urges but I tend to just go to my room put my music on really loud and scream into a pillow and it tends to work.
If anyone wants any help don't hesitate to get in touch with me.

[Clippedwings]

congradulations ruby thats a great accomplishment!

I'm really proud of you!

[Done-With-It!]

That's Awesome Ruby!

So how do you get through the times when those urges are at
there worst? You know when you feel like your at your breaking point? I think a lot of people do good until they hit
that point, where they feel like it they don't they are goint to explode.

Any suggestions that help you get through those moments?

[Chy]

That is so awesome Ruby! Wow you can be a great role model around here because you've been there. I sure hope you keep checking in. Thanks for sharing those positive vibes with us!

[RubyTuesday]

When those urges get their worst I tend to go to bed and try and go to sleep.
If that doesn't work, I write.
I write stories and I write poems of how I feel.
Sometimes I try and write songs but to be honest with you I aint that good.
But I always tell someone that I feel that way.
I thinks it's best to tell someone that you know will help you through it.
Parents, I think are the worst people to tell really because they tend to go weird with you.
Tell a friend or come online and tell someone that you know will help.
But you have to try and stay positive within yourself.
Write down all the good things that you have in your life and keep reminding yourself of them.
What I find that doesn't really help is that stupid idea of putting a elastic band around your wrist and flicking it every time you get an urge.
Because if you get really bad urges you tend to go overboard with the flicking of the elastic band and that tends to hurt you as much as cutting yourself would.
Try a red marker pen on your skin where you would cut.
Or just try screaming your head off into a pillow or in the middle of a field in the middle of nowhere.
You just have to try and think of what you felt like the last time you cut/burned/self-harmed yourself.
You have to think of the guilt that you felt after you did it and of how much you hurt the people around you that you did it again.
If anyone wants to talk about it they can talk to me.
PM me or something like that.

[Kellie]

You are right on target Ruby.
I believe that the key to conquering any disorder/addiction is reaching out and sharing your pain with others, especially those who know where you are because they have been there or are still battling demons themselves.
It is really good have you here, you express yourself wonderfully.

[RubyTuesday]

I tend to just tell it as it is.
There is no point sugar-coating it.
What good does that do?

[Kellie]

Honesty is the best policy

[RubyTuesday]

^^^^^^^Exactly

[LAStarlette]

S&I trying to quit