Tips for Better Communication

[Kellie]

Try to listen to the other person's point of view even if you don't agree.

Keep as calm as you can.

Be respectful (even if the other person is not). Don't resort to swearing, shouting or put downs.

Try to let the other person finish before you have your say.

Make your point as clearly as you can.

Choose a good time to discuss touchy subjects with your parents, for example when they are relaxed and have time to listen.

Be as open and honest as you can.

Be reasonable. Ask for what you want but accept that sometimes it is not possible or practical.

Ask for time out if a discussion is getting out of control. You could say 'Can I have a minute to cool down?', 'I need some time to think about this, I'm going outside for a minute or two' or 'Can we call it quits for now and work this out later when I feel less upset and angry?'.

Try to think before you speak.

Keep the communication open. Avoid bottom line statements like 'Well, if you don't agree with me I'm going to move out'. Statements like this tend to stop communication dead and they leave the other person with no options or control.

here are usually some warning bells when a discussion isn't going too well and an argument might be brewing. To avoid full scale conflict, learn to listen for these signals. If one of you is getting upset, angry or withdrawing from the conversation it is often a good idea to ask for some time out.

Here are some signs that things are getting out of hand:

• raised voices

• people beginning to interrupt and talk over each other
• waving hands about and pointing fingers
• starting to withdraw and not wanting to listen
• sweating and feeling as though you are going to hit something (or someone)

When you begin to notice these things happening, it's a good idea to stop the action and ask for time out. This gives the message to your mum or dad that you do want to work out the problem but not by fighting with them. It also gives everyone time to cool down and come up with a better approach to the problem. Can you think of a time when it would have been a good idea to have asked for time out?




It might be a good idea to discuss this technique with your parents during a 'cool' conversation.

[Chy]

Good stuff Kel!

[Chy]

Bump