Suicide: Selfish, or not Selfish?

[dont cry for me]

Suicide

What is everyones opinions on suicide?

Is it taking the easy way out?

Is it selfish?

Is it a cry for help thats gone too far?

Is it a shame that someone felt that was their only way out?

The reason i ask is in school we were discussing whether in the eyes of religion suicide is a sin, and why. And it started a debate about if it was selfish or not.

I am truly undecided about it. I think on some levels it is selfish, because if you know someone who's died (especially through suicide), then you can appreciate how hard it is, but then maybe your life is the only thing you can be allowed to be selfish with.

But id be interested in everyone else opinions on it.

Thankyou

[Chy]

I guess I've never looked at it as selfish but more simply a permanent solution to a temporary problem. I think people at this point in their life are in deep pain and have a block in realizing there is help.

[dont cry for me]

yeah thats kinda what i think, but then again looking at it from people who care about the person, i suppose i can see why some people say its selfish...

[Chy]

Yeah, I agree to.. but then if you think about those in the grief process are saying that the one who died was selfish right? But isn't really them being selfish at thier loss and not understanding the pain of the individual? Does that make sense. Kind of an ugly cycle. I don't think the people that are to the jumping off point are even thinking about how bad they would be hurting their loved ones because they can't see beyond their own pain. Then again that could be construed as selfish... so gee I just don't know. Except it pains me to think someone could be in that much pain, know what I mean?

[dont cry for me]

yeah i totally get what you mean. and i suppose if you were at the point of suicide u wouldnt think about anyone else, but im not sure if i would say that was selfish or just a shame that they felt that way.

this is such a strange debate... i guess theres no straight answer.

[Chy]

Yeah, I tend to agree there. No "right" answer.

[Done-With-It!]

Good Topic
Something I've thought often about
and alot about this week ironically.

My uncle killed himself
My other uncle shot himself in the face
and then called us.
He changed his mind after the bullet entered.
He survived.

My grandma tried more times than one can count,
my cousin tried and has screwed up her liver,
my aunt has tried, Etc..
Runs on both sides of my family.

My uncle who suceeded,
My mom's brother.
His absense I'd say is a constant prescense in our life.
Life goes on because it has to, but no one was ever the same.
I don't think he was selfish, I think he was in a pain greater than he knew how to handle.

I often see it like, it's selfish for the ones
who see it as selfish to want to keep someone alive who is
in that much pain.
People say it's selfish often, but they don't want to be around to help someone get through the suicidal times because they don't understand or don't want to deal.

I think anyone should always wait and not act on their impulses when they are suicidal, call someone or
just wait because whatever it is will pass.
Usually you just somehow have to talk to someone.

So I don't think it's ever the right thing to do, but
I do understand it, and I don't think it's an
act of selfishness, if you think people are better
off without you, and that's what they think,
I don't think that's selfish.
My .2 cents.

[Kellie]

Yeah Good Topic, but a hard topic as well.
I like what you said Done.
I have been suicidal more times than I care to openly admit...
and the alcohol made the tendency 100% worse.
When you feel that depressed, you definitely need to seek professional help. Your thinking is really not logical, it is distorted to say the least.
I would get so low, that I honestly believed that the world (including my beautiful boy) would be much better off without me... and I was not fishing around for reassurances, I totally believed that I was worthless.
Thankfully there is medication and there are ways to get through these times if and/or when you might ever encounter a period of serious depression.
For me, finally getting sober both physically and spiritually helped the most.
Now when I feel a funk coming on, I am sober enough to deal with it level headedly.
No I have never agreed with the religious take that it is a sin, I think that was and is used as a scare/control tactic within the religious establishment.
I understand how people get angry and sad and scared when someone they love dies from suicide. But I know that when a person is in that much pain and agony, they need our love and understanding more than ever, more than ever.

[*silenced*]

Its such a hard one.
I mean, if I think about it for me, I feel like its not selfish. But not one time I tried to kill myself did I have anyone who would have cared (and please dont say my parents, its a long story and they didnt care that I even tried) but if I had, then would I have thought twice?
And having lost someone to, well, perhaps suicide (its not certain), and how it made me feel, I was angry that he would leave me behind. Did he think about me before he died? Did he care how it would effect me? Its really hard to judge.
I mean, its not fair for a mother to kill herself if she has children who need her, but its not fair on the mother if she wants to die and no-one is helping her. I know was its like to feel like theres no way out, that suicide is the only option, so perhaps its not selfish, if its the only way you can see?
I think that anyone who if hurting like that, need help. And if they're not given it, who can blame them for wating to die?
No one should be in pain. But does that mean if they cant get help, then they should die? Its really hard!