Fighting but losing

[renee18]

Today I got to sleep in which was nice for a change. I thought today was going to be a good day and so far it has been really challenging for me. All I am thinking about it binging. I have had two pieces of cake one for breakfast and one for lunch. I had cookie dough too. When my roommate is not here all I want to do is binge. I normally do not binge when she is here so when she is not I binge. The past few days I have just wanted to binge and not starve at all. All I want it sugar and more sugar. I feel like I have no place to go right now. I want help but I can't afford it and I know I can't do this on my own anymore. When I am alone or lonely I want to binge. I don't know what else to do.

Renee

[ashlee19554]

Your not alone anymore if you want to talk im here.

[Hopefloats]

Reach out Renee.....
I have a best friend with an eating disorder. We have been friends for years. I cannot say that I "feel" what you feel, but I do offer you my support. I have learned a lot from my friend. She too wants to binge and most of the time it is when she is alone. She says partly because it brings her comfort and partly because she does not want her husband to see her.

You are right, in that you do need all the support you can get. You will get that here, and I am wondering if there are support groups in your area? I know our local hospital has one. Often times if you can get to just one, you can find transportation if you need it. Also, do you have any counseling in your area that will work with you if finances are an issue? Just a thought..as where I live, there are many that will work on a sliding scale for payment...

Keep posting and reaching out.
(((Hugs))

[renee18]

Thanks for the continued support. I am working with a counselor but she does not specialize in eating disorders. That is why I am trying to find a new counselor. Today so far I am doing okay. i am going to go shower and I will be back later to post more

Renee

[Hopefloats]

How are things going Renee? Thinking of you..
Hope

[annihilate_me]

Renee, I noticed you live in Massilon. Can I ask you what county it's in? I'm just wondering because in Portage County the Keven Colman center has counseling services that work around income and I think there's a center in Stark or Summit county in Firestone Park in Akron that also works around income. I can always check on it, so if you want me to let me know.

Check in soon, big big HUGS!

-Amanda

[renee18]

I am doing better. I am still just really tired from work today. The binging has not been as bad which is good. I have been working more which helps as well. I not always thinking about food as much as I was and that is a blessing.

I am now living in Ashland County and there is not much help in this county.

I am heading to bed. I have to get up early in the morning.

Night
Renee